I have often said that we need people in our lives who will tell us the truth and expose our blindspots.
For me, one of those people is my wife. She has a wonderful way of pointing out things that I don’t see.
It happened again this morning.
I was updating the list of books I have read this year. I mentioned to her that I had read 73 books this year.
Laura looked across the table and said: “You know what I have decided about you? You like the bragging rights! You like to brag about how many books you’ve read. You like to brag about how long you rode the bicycle during your workouts.”
Ouch!
But her observation made me wonder:
What is your motive for doing some of the things you do?
Are you only involved in those so you can tell others you are involved?
Are you just in it for the bragging rights?
When I pause and ponder those questions, I have to admit that my motive isn’t always pure. Too often, I do like to brag, I do like the attention.
Ouch!
But I am thankful that I have someone in my life who loves me enough to challenge my motives and reveal the stuff that’s in my blindspot.
Even when it hurts.
Wednesday, December 30, 2009
OUCH!
Tuesday, December 29, 2009
The Passion of a Professional
In the book, Everything They Had: Sports Writing from David Halberstam, there is a great quote from Julius Erving:
"Being a professional is doing the things you love to do, on the days you don't feel like doing them."
"Being a professional is doing the things you love to do, on the days you don't feel like doing them."
Halberstam used the quote to explain his own passion for writing, whether it was about history or sports.
I get it. You see, I am a professional teacher.
I am so blessed that I get to do what I love to do - what God has gifted me to do - and earn a great living doing it.
But there are days when I just don't feel like doing it. On those days, I often reflect on the notes and comments I have received from students over the years. Many of those notes were sent when the student had no way of knowing that I was in a funk. I think the Lord knew and He prompted them to send the note.
And when I read those notes I am reminded - again - that its not about me. I am reminded of why I do this. And I apologize to God for forgetting what a blessing it is to get to earn a living doing what I love to do - even when I don't feel like it.
Monday, December 28, 2009
Your Personal Report Card
I don't know about you, but for me the holiday season is usually a time for reflection, evaluation, and planning. Its a great time to give ourselves a "report card." Here's one I adopted from
Leading on Empty, Wayne Cordeiro's book, Leading on Empty.
Leading on Empty, Wayne Cordeiro's book, Leading on Empty.
This report card is essentially a personal “dashboard” that includes several gauges that monitor and measure the vital arenas of your life. The arenas represent the subsystems of life that are vital to our health and success.
The following arenas are suggested. The tool should be customized to fit your life situation. This evaluation should be done periodically. I would also suggest that you invite your spouse and other members of your inner circle to evaluate you in these areas.
Assign a letter grade for each arena. Be brutally honest with yourself. In addition to the letter grade you assign, write a few sentences that provide the basis for the grade assigned. Also, make notes on steps that need be taken to make improvements.
Faith Life
Marriage Life
Family Life
Work Life
Computer Life
Ministry Life
Financial Life
Social Life
Attitudinal Life
Physical Life
Other
Are there any arenas that require immediate maintenance and repair?
Sunday, December 27, 2009
That Ought to Scare You
One of the most disappointing new events of 2009 has to be the Tiger Woods fiasco. For the last several weeks every day brought a new revelation. Millions of fans have been disappointed.
To me its a great example of a quote from one of my favorite leadership authors, Andy Stanley:
“Character is not essential to leadership. But character is what makes you a leader worth following. Your talent and giftedness as a leader have the potential to take you farther than your character can sustain you… That ought to scare you.”
Andy Stanley, The Next Generation Leader
Another one of my favorite leadership authors also had something to say about this:
"Now these things happened to them as an example, and they were written for our instruction, upon whom the ends of the ages have come. Therefore, let him who thinks he stands take heed that he does not fall." (Paul, 1 Corinthians 10:11-13)
We set goals for the things we want to accomplish, yet we rarely set goals when it comes to developing our character. I think we should be as intentional about developing our character as we are about achieving material goals.
We also need to cultivate relationships with people who will challenge us and hold us accountable for those goals. We need a personal board of advisers that will challenge us - not enable us. We should invite their scrutiny and thank them for loving us enough to not let us destroy ourselves and the lives of those we love.
To me its a great example of a quote from one of my favorite leadership authors, Andy Stanley:
“Character is not essential to leadership. But character is what makes you a leader worth following. Your talent and giftedness as a leader have the potential to take you farther than your character can sustain you… That ought to scare you.”
Andy Stanley, The Next Generation Leader
Another one of my favorite leadership authors also had something to say about this:
"Now these things happened to them as an example, and they were written for our instruction, upon whom the ends of the ages have come. Therefore, let him who thinks he stands take heed that he does not fall." (Paul, 1 Corinthians 10:11-13)
We set goals for the things we want to accomplish, yet we rarely set goals when it comes to developing our character. I think we should be as intentional about developing our character as we are about achieving material goals.
We also need to cultivate relationships with people who will challenge us and hold us accountable for those goals. We need a personal board of advisers that will challenge us - not enable us. We should invite their scrutiny and thank them for loving us enough to not let us destroy ourselves and the lives of those we love.
Remember:
"Your talent and giftedness as a leader have the potential to take you farther than your character can sustain you. That ought to scare you.”
Thursday, December 24, 2009
Among Us - Part 2
"And He said to them, 'The kings of the Gentiles lord it over them; and those who have authority over them are called 'Benefactors.' But it is not this way with you, but the one who is the greatest among you must become like the youngest, and the leader like the servant.
For who is greater, the one who reclines at the table or the one who serves? Is it not the one who reclines at the table? But I am among you as the one who serves."
(Luke 22: 25-27)
This may be one of the greatest passages on leadership ever written. So, let's put this in context.
There seems to have been an on-going debate among the disciples about their rank and position in the coming kingdom of God. This issue was particularly acute for James and John. At one point, even their mother came making a request that they be granted a special position in the coming kingdom.
(See Matthew 20:20-28. This is what I have come to call the "mother of a son syndrome." I became aware of this coaching little league baseball. The mothers were much more difficult to deal with than the dads. At the time, I was not aware that such behavior had a biblical basis!)
In response to their wish, Jesus turns the whole idea of leadership upside down. Rather than advocating headship based on formal authority that is "lorded over" the followers, he advocates a leadership that is based on service.
But service is not done at a distance. Note that He says "I am among you as the one who serves."
Not separate, not isolated, not protected by a hierarchy and multiple levels of filters and screens.
"I am among you."
I have had some pretty direct conversations with high ranking officials in organizations who liked to advertise their "open door" policy. While that might sound good, it is a reactive and passive approach to leading. In each of these situations there were multiple obstacles that actually deterred access to these people. In contrast I advocated - rather strongly - that they needed to get out of their office, get beyond the filters of their organizational hierarchy, and get out among the people of their organization.
The Lord Himself took the initiative to "get out of the office" and dwell among us.
I think that's a pretty good role model.
For who is greater, the one who reclines at the table or the one who serves? Is it not the one who reclines at the table? But I am among you as the one who serves."
(Luke 22: 25-27)
This may be one of the greatest passages on leadership ever written. So, let's put this in context.
There seems to have been an on-going debate among the disciples about their rank and position in the coming kingdom of God. This issue was particularly acute for James and John. At one point, even their mother came making a request that they be granted a special position in the coming kingdom.
(See Matthew 20:20-28. This is what I have come to call the "mother of a son syndrome." I became aware of this coaching little league baseball. The mothers were much more difficult to deal with than the dads. At the time, I was not aware that such behavior had a biblical basis!)
In response to their wish, Jesus turns the whole idea of leadership upside down. Rather than advocating headship based on formal authority that is "lorded over" the followers, he advocates a leadership that is based on service.
But service is not done at a distance. Note that He says "I am among you as the one who serves."
Not separate, not isolated, not protected by a hierarchy and multiple levels of filters and screens.
"I am among you."
I have had some pretty direct conversations with high ranking officials in organizations who liked to advertise their "open door" policy. While that might sound good, it is a reactive and passive approach to leading. In each of these situations there were multiple obstacles that actually deterred access to these people. In contrast I advocated - rather strongly - that they needed to get out of their office, get beyond the filters of their organizational hierarchy, and get out among the people of their organization.
The Lord Himself took the initiative to "get out of the office" and dwell among us.
I think that's a pretty good role model.
Wednesday, December 23, 2009
Reading Material
I haven't posted my reading list since July. I didn't stop reading, I just didn't post the lists ... another symptom of "the fall" I experienced when the wheels came off during the autumn season.
So, here's the update/catch-up list of readings from August through December (so far):
August:
Oxygen, Carol Cassella
Shelter Me, Juliette Fay
The Tenth Circle, Jodi Picoult
A Passion for Faithfulness: Wisdom from the Book of Nehemiah, J.I. Packer
The Shadow of the Wind, Carlos Ruiz Zafón
Tinkers, Paul Harding (count =57)
September:
Three Steps Forward, Two Steps Back, Charles R. Swindoll
Becoming a Resonant Leader: Develop Your Emotional Intelligence, Renew Your Relationships, Sustain Your Effectiveness
Richard E. Boyatzis, Fran Johnston, Annie McKee
Hedgehogs and Foxes: Character, Leadership, and Command in Organizations, Abraham Zaleznik
Await Your Reply, Dan Chaon
Before Abraham: Creation, Sin, and the Character of God, John MacArthur
October:
Laugh Again, Charles R. Swindoll
Mentoring Like Jesus, Regi Campbell
Have a Little Faith, Mitch Albom
November:
The Father of Israel: Trusting God’s Promises, John MacArthur
Everything They Had: Sports Writing from David Halberstam
Mercy, Jodi Picoult
The Time It Never Rained, Elmer Kelton
December:
Jacob and Egypt: The Sovereignty of God, John MacArthur
Icy Sparks, Gwyn Hyman Rubio
Vanishing Acts, Jody Picoult
Those in bold faced type are highly recommended.
So, here's the update/catch-up list of readings from August through December (so far):
August:
Oxygen, Carol Cassella
Shelter Me, Juliette Fay
The Tenth Circle, Jodi Picoult
A Passion for Faithfulness: Wisdom from the Book of Nehemiah, J.I. Packer
The Shadow of the Wind, Carlos Ruiz Zafón
Tinkers, Paul Harding (count =57)
September:
Three Steps Forward, Two Steps Back, Charles R. Swindoll
Becoming a Resonant Leader: Develop Your Emotional Intelligence, Renew Your Relationships, Sustain Your Effectiveness
Richard E. Boyatzis, Fran Johnston, Annie McKee
Hedgehogs and Foxes: Character, Leadership, and Command in Organizations, Abraham Zaleznik
Await Your Reply, Dan Chaon
Before Abraham: Creation, Sin, and the Character of God, John MacArthur
October:
Laugh Again, Charles R. Swindoll
Mentoring Like Jesus, Regi Campbell
Have a Little Faith, Mitch Albom
November:
The Father of Israel: Trusting God’s Promises, John MacArthur
Everything They Had: Sports Writing from David Halberstam
Mercy, Jodi Picoult
The Time It Never Rained, Elmer Kelton
December:
Jacob and Egypt: The Sovereignty of God, John MacArthur
Icy Sparks, Gwyn Hyman Rubio
Vanishing Acts, Jody Picoult
Those in bold faced type are highly recommended.
Tuesday, December 22, 2009
Among Us - Part 1
"BEHOLD, THE VIRGIN SHALL BE WITH CHILD AND SHALL BEAR A SON, AND THEY SHALL CALL HIS NAME IMMANUEL," which translated means, "GOD WITH US." (Matthew 1: 22-23)
"In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. ... And the Word became flesh, and dwelt among us, and we saw His glory, glory as of the only begotten from the Father, full of grace and truth." (John 1: 1, 14)
As we celebrate the birth of Christ this week, I would like to consider the leadership implications of His coming.
There's a myth that permeates some leadership environments. Its the idea that the leader must be separated from those he or she leads. This involves keeping followers at arms length - or further. In the framework of culture analyst, Geert Hofstede, these leaders maintain a high power distance.
I don't agree.
For some time now, I have been defining leadership as intentional influence that takes place in the context of a relationship. Unpacking that definition shows that leadership is up close, its personal. It can not be done at a distance. It cannot be done effectively by maintaining a high power distance.
If God, the Creator and Sustainer of the universe decided to come and be with us and to dwell among us, how much more should we as human leaders choose to be with those we lead?
We too should be among those we lead.
"In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. ... And the Word became flesh, and dwelt among us, and we saw His glory, glory as of the only begotten from the Father, full of grace and truth." (John 1: 1, 14)
As we celebrate the birth of Christ this week, I would like to consider the leadership implications of His coming.
There's a myth that permeates some leadership environments. Its the idea that the leader must be separated from those he or she leads. This involves keeping followers at arms length - or further. In the framework of culture analyst, Geert Hofstede, these leaders maintain a high power distance.
I don't agree.
For some time now, I have been defining leadership as intentional influence that takes place in the context of a relationship. Unpacking that definition shows that leadership is up close, its personal. It can not be done at a distance. It cannot be done effectively by maintaining a high power distance.
If God, the Creator and Sustainer of the universe decided to come and be with us and to dwell among us, how much more should we as human leaders choose to be with those we lead?
We too should be among those we lead.
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