"Sir"

I have never been one for the formality of language. I didn’t say “yes, sir” and “no, ma'am” to my parents when I was a kid. And we didn’t insist that our kids do that with us.

Interestingly, they always did this with other adults.

I know some people think that’s a sign of respect, but I am just not that hung up about it.

I don’t insist that people refer to me as “Doctor” either. In fact my students call me by my first name…even the freshmen call me by my first name. It rankles some of my colleagues who demand that students show respect.

If you want to be respected, you need to be respectable. And if you are, people will respect you. If you have to demand that others respect you, then something’s missing.

This week I ran into a young friend of mine twice. Jeff is twenty years younger than I am. And every time I see him, I am reminded of a conversation we had a few years ago.

We had gone out to eat with Jeff and his wife. The parking lot at Northpark Mall was crowded and we knew we would have to park way out, so we dropped our wives off at the door. As Jeff and I were walking to the restaurant, I said something and Jeff responded, “Yes, sir.”

I said, “Jeff, don’t call me sir. You make me feel old.”

Jeff grinned and said, “You are old, sir.”